Like the Moon
by AshtheAwesomeRainbow
Summary: Remus Lupin has a hard time forgetting about his dead girlfriend, Sarah Quinn. While his friends help him to get over her, they all find Sarah's 'memories' everywhere. Remus then realizes, he'll never forget about her, but makes her a memory.


Like the Moon

Her face had this delicacy, this pureness. The moon softly stroke her skin as if it loved her, too.

"_I am a child of the moon and the sun and all the stars in between, Remus."_

She had once said, while her eyes still sparkled, like the stars themselves had chosen to go and live in there. He could nothing but smile. Her hand was soft as she stroked his face, her well-shaped lips clustered to his cheek.

"_I love you, and only you."_

The wind took her whisper along, so it still haunted him at night. At once, Remus remembered the day she left, and he had been too late. A single tear fell on her doll-like face, a peaceful smile glued to her lips. She had been precious, as her laugh echoed through his head, she had been lovely. Perfect. But at that moment, when Remus looked at Sarah's face, she had just been a lifeless vision of perfection. Of death.

**

"Please, Moony. Don't tell me you're still thinking about her." Sirius voice startled him and Remus glanced over his shoulder. Sirius stood beside him, his shoulders hanging low.

"Padfoot Dot sneak up on me like that!" Sirius rolled his eyes and shrugged.

"Sorry. But answer my question." Remus sighed and turned his face to the window again. Rain poured down from the sky, raindrops ran over the colored glass, high up in the tower.

"How could I ever forget about her, Pads?" He whispered and sighed again, brushing his dirty-blonde hair out of his face. Sirius' hand placed on his shoulder, pressing on it softly.

"It's now nearly a year ago. You must let go, you have to. Sarah wouldn't want you to be like this. You like your dead, Remus."

"How can you understand?!"

Sirius face tensed and his hand left Remus' shoulder. "You're not the only one who cared about her!"

"_Are you alright?" She glanced up at him and smiled. Her coffee-brown eyes met his and she shrugged._

"_I'm okay, I guess."_

_Sirius grinned and dropped himself next to her in the wet grass. Sarah ran a hand through her ebony-colored hair. "So wassup?" He asked, curiously glancing towards her. Her smile saddened as she sighed._

"_Had a fight again, with Chris."_

_Sirius lips twitched and the girl glared at him. "Sorry! I just..Hate the guy." _

"_Only because you have a major crush on him!" Sarah casted back, a teasing grin cracking open her face. Now he glared to her and Sarah fluttered her eyelashes innocently. Sirius chuckled and gave her a push._

"_I hate you. Bitch." She grinned and pushed back, which didn't actually affect him. _

"_No, you love me. Really." Her arms wrapped around his shoulders, her head resting against the side of his. Sirius let his arms slide around her tiny waist._

"_I'll think about it."_

"_You're my best friend, Sirius, I know you do." Sarah retorted, and poked his side with her finger. _

"_Do that once more, and you'll be in the lake." Sirius said, pulling a serious face. She cocked an eyebrow and poked his side again._

"_Then you'll go down with me!" She cried as he lifted her up and raced towards the water. Sirius threw her in, but Sarah locked her arms around his neck, pulling him along her. Together they crashed through the dark surface of the water. The moon made a circled reflection on the water. _

"_Told you so!" Sirius cackled triumphantly._

"_No, told you so!" Sarah grinned, pushing his head under water. A bright grin appeared on her face as he came up again, snorting. _

"_Now you're dead Quinn!" He cried, swimming after her. _

_Sarah laughed, swimming away madly. "No, no! Please, mercy!"_

"_Fine."Sirius grumbled, clasping his hands on the water. "Let's get you out of the water, missy." _

_He swam towards her, lifting her up so she could crawl out of the water. He fell down next to her in the grass and sent her a cheeky grin._

_Sarah rolled her eyes and got on her feet. "Let's get inside." Her arm wrapped around his waist as they walked back to the castle._

"It's different, Sirius and you know it." Remus said blankly, not looking at him. Sirius sighed and threw his hands up in a desperate gesture.

"I lost one of my best friends!"

"I lost my love."

Sirius bit his lip and sighed. He raised his shoulders and turned away, making sure Remus couldn't see the hopelessness in his eyes. _I give up,_ He thought and descended one stair. _I'm sorry, Moony._

"Fine, Remus. You can be miserable as long as you want. I'm going to dinner."

**

"_Sirius?" A voice whispered, making Remus look up at the small light that shone through the crack of the opened door. A tiny figure stood in the doorpost and glanced at him curiously._

"_He's not here," Remus replied, glancing back at the girl. She rubbed the dark hairs out of her face and sighed, dropping herself down on Sirius' bed. As her shoulders shook and he heard her sniff softly, Remus scooped over to her and lifted up her chin._

"_But maybe I can help you?" He asked, wiping the tears from her cheeks. As there were more tears streaming over her face, and he had the chance to look into her eyes, Remus recognized her._

"_Sarah? What's wrong?" He asked alarmed, noticing her as the girl that always hung around Sirius. _What has he done now again, _Remus thought with a sigh and wrapped his arm around her fragile shoulder. _

"_C-Chr..Chris.." She stuttered and took a deep breath._

"_Chris hit me." Sarah spit out, pressing her head to his shoulder. Remus felt anger arise him._

"_He did- WHAT?!"_

"_We..We had this fight and..and.." Sarah's voice broke. His hand caressed her hair, whispering soothing words in her ear. " Chris was drunk, he hit me and I-I.." _

"_It's okay.." Remus said softly, one hand stroking over her back. The girl looked up at him, her eyes full of fear and pain, hurt._

"_I broke up with him." He glanced at her in a surprised way, and couldn't help but his voice raising one pitch in surprise._

"_Really?" _

_Now a soft smile cracked open Sarah's face as she chuckled." Yeah. Feels good to say that. Thank you, Remus. Really." _

_Even though it was dark, he examined her face, a hand stroking over her cheek. She looked back, her eyes having that magical sparkle again. Sarah pressed her lips together, before his crashed on hers. He felt her warm tongue and closed his eyes, pulling her closer. Then the girl pushed him away softly, smiling apologetic. She stood up, and bashed away from the room, not looking around once._

_**_

" Remus?" James asked, his feet dragging over the stairs. Remus looked at him and tried to smile. _Fail,_ he though and placed a plate of food besides him.

"O, hey Prongs." His friend's voice sounded flat, monotone.

"Brought you some food." He said, nodding with his head to the plate. Remus shove it away, shaking his own.

"I'm not hungry. " James sighed, dropping himself down next to Remus.

"Look Moony, I know this day -these days- is not your day. But you'll have to eat."

"I'm. Not. Hungry." But as he opened his mouth to interfere again, a soft hand touched his shoulder. James looked around and smiled at his girlfriend.

"Hey love, could you-"

"You go to Sirius. I'll talk to Remus." Lily said, kissing his cheek. James shrugged and walked down the stairs again.

**

As James walked away, Lily sat down next to him. For a while she said nothing, just stared out of the window, along him.

"So, what are you going to say, to persuade me to be happy?" Remus asked sarcastically.

"Do you remember last year's Winter Ball?" Lily asked in a quiet voice. He scoffed, as ofcoarse he did.

"Ofcoarse I do. When Chris-"

"Yes, I know." The girl smirked slightly.

_Remus looked up at her and smiled. As Sarah walked down the stairs in her blue ball gown, she looked like an angel to him. Her smile was dazzling, her eyes sparkled lively. Lily pulled her along, laughing loudly. Sarah chimed along. As he looked to his side, Remus smiled at James, who was staring at Lily, who indeed looked amazing in her soft pink baby doll dress, her red hair flowing over her shoulders. But his eyes were drawn to Sarah. Her brown eyes found his as she slipped her through his and pressed her lips to his ear._

"_You look so handsome." She whispered and turned to Lily again._

"_Shall we go?" The girls pulled their dates along, James still paralyzed by Lily's appearance. _

_They danced the night away, Remus holding Sarah close in his arms. But every now and then she'd turn, twirl around to Lily and Janet, their other friend, doing some goofy dance. _

"_I'm really having a great time. Thanks for taking me." Sarah smiled and pressed her lips on Remus'. The world stopped as they kissed, he only heard their unison heartbeats, and Remus felt like flying. Until a fist on his cheek smacked him to the ground again. The person yanked Sarah away from his dream._

"_What do you think you're doing?" Chris hissed, pulling her hair angrily._

"_Chris, back off, we're through, remember? T-H-R-O-U-G-H. through. Do you want to tell everybody why?" Sarah spat back, grinding her teeth together._

"_Chris, let Sarah go." Lily's voice sneered through the room. Chris flinched slightly and stared at the girl._

"_But, Lils-"_

"_No! You know she's right. So Let. Her. Go. Don't make me feel embarrassed for being your best friend." _Auch, _Remus thought as Chris' face turned pale. _

"_Fine." He snapped, letting go of Sarah's hair. Chris ran out of the Great Hall, probably embarrassed and hurt. But Remus didn't feel sorry for him. As soon as he had Sarah back in his arms, he smiled at her._

"_Y'know, Sarah, I'd like to ask you something.." Her eyes had a hopeful shimmer, as she smiled._

"_Yes?"_

"_Would you please-"_

"_Oh my god, Sarah! What the hell was that with Chris!" Janet cried and pulled her along, to make sure she knew everything. Remus stood there as her eyes where fixed on him, flashing him an apologetic smile when Janet pulled her along._

_**_

Lily sighed softly."I want to show you something." She said, pulling her jumper over her head. Grinning at Remus' flabbergasted expression she turned her back to him, unbuttoning her shirt. Remus stared at her.

"Lily? What are you- Would you just stop! Please!"

"Just look, okay?" Lily rolled her eyes and slipped her shirt over her shoulders until it fell on her waist. Remus stared at her bare back, and his eyes rested on the girls shoulder blades.

"The left one is a memorial for Sarah." Lily said. His eyes were fixed on Sarah's beautiful face, her charming laugh and twinkling eyes. _ It's just a tattoo, Remus, _he thought as his heart made a jump.' _Make the memory', _the text under Sarah's face said. A smile cracked open Remus' sorrow.

"Yeah, she used to say that." He smiled, as his attention got drawn to her left shoulder blade. "But what's the other?" He stared at the heart with _'S.J.' _in it. Lily chuckled.

"Oh, that."

"_Sarah? Where the hell are we going?!" Lily grinned as she got dragged along through muggle London. The streets were narrow and filthy and kinda reminded her of Knockturn Alley. _

"_We're here!" Sarah said enthusiastically. Janet furrowed her eyebrows. _

"_Uh, Sarah? '_Tattoo Bob'_?" She said, hesitation dripping through her tone. They stared at the grubby store and Lily saw Janet imagine all the dirty needles pricking in her flesh, a lot of hurt, and all of it. But Sarah chuckled._

"_Yeah, Sirius gave me a tattoo for my birthday, so I thought, it would be fun. Making another memory. And it doesn't hurt that bad." _

"_Oh, yes, ofcoarse. Now you really made me feel better." Janet rolled her eyes. But Lily actually got interested._

"_Might be fun. Let's get inside."_

"And it was real fun." Lily smiled, closing her shirt again. "Look, Remus, I know it's hard, but I know my best friend. Sarah would want you to go on, fall in love again. She doesn't mind if it is with a boy."

Remus eyes widened in shock as he stared at her, a surprised expression on his face. Lily shrugged, raising her shoulders casually.

"I can see it. The way you look at him. You used to look at Sarah-"

"I'll never look at anyone the way I looked at Sarah!" Remus exclaimed, glaring at Lily. The girl's green eyes met his, her denial of what he said cut through his soul.

"Yes, you will, Remus. And it's only natural. You don't want to spent like..seventy more years alone, now do you?" She whispered and got on her feet again, giving him one last glance.

"Think about it."

**

Remus thought about the _accident_, Bella's accident.

"_We'd just been making fun, and at once she just..fell."_

He could still hear Bellatrix's innocent voice ringing through his head. But she was never innocent.

"_What have you done to her, Bella?" Sirius sneered as they kneeled down by her dead body. Remus stood there motionless, staring at Sarah's face. Bella shrugged her shoulders and looked her cousin._

"_I didn't do anything, Sirius. We we're just playing a game. And then she fell."_

"_You never play games with mudbloods, Bella." Sirius growled, pulling his wand. _

"_Oh, what now? Are you going to curse me, cousin? Please, spare me." Bella sneered, her voice now in a childish tone. _

"_You are a murderess!" Remus grabbed his friend's arms to hold him back. "Sirius, that's just what she wants." He hissed. Bella roared a maniac laugh._

"_Fine then. It was a game. But poor Sarah lost it. And she knew that before we even started playing. Now think about that." Remus wanted to pull all her black hair out of her scalp, but Bellatrix already turned around, stalking away, blurting out more laughs._

_**_

Remus pushed aside some bushes, gazing around. _It must be here somewhere,_ he thought and sighed relieved as he saw what he was looking for.

"Lumos." He whispered and let the light shine over one more of Sarah's 'memories.'

_Sarah sat in the grass, playing with some stones. Remus looked at her, a smile on his face. The grass was wet with the morning dawn, and felt comfortable underneath his feet._

"_What are you doing?" He asked, as Sarah looked up and beckoned him to come and look._

"_Making a memory."She said, a charming smile glued to her face. He grinned as he saw the stones, formed in a heart with 'S and R' in it. _

"_Lovely, but it will be washed away by the rain soon enough." He teased, poking her side. Sarah's eyes lit up, shaking her head. _

"_No it won't. Try rolling a stone away." She said, triggering his curiousness. Remus put his foot on one of the stones to move it, but the stone didn't budge._

"_Permanent sticking spell." Sarah chuckled as she got on her feet and draped her arms around his neck. Her smile broadened as his arms slid around her waist._

"_It's pretty good hidden over here." Remus said with a mischievous smirk on his face, glancing around. They were surrounded by trees, perfectly hidden._

_Sarah's hand trailed over his stomach down. "Yup. Just you and me." She said, curving an eyebrow and pressed her lips on his._

Now, Remus noticed a note attached to one of the stones. He wondered why he hadn't noticed it before and then realized he hadn't been here since.._what happened_. He opened the note and smiled as he noticed the curly handwriting.

**Dear Remus. By the time you'll find this, if you ever do, I'm probably dead already. I want you to know that I knew about Bella's plan with me and that I decided to give it one last shot. To try to defeat her one last time. On my own. This is why I won't tell you. Doing now, anyways. I know you don't understand. But Lily and Janet do. You can ask them, since I'm not here anymore to tell you myself. But know this, Remus. Don't mourn over me, and live your life, for it's so worth it. ****Be alive, Remus.**** I love you. Yours truly, Sarah.**

"Sarah owed Bellatrix a lot of money, Remus." He turned around, startled by the voice and saw Janet, smiling apologetic.

"Janet? How-"

"I just followed you." She said, walking towards him. In silence they stared at Sarah's memory, one of the thousands she had left behind.

"But what do you mean, Janet?" Remus sighed, brushing his dirty-blonde hair out of his face.

"Sarah owed Bellatrix a lot of money, for keeping her secret. Bella found out that..That Sarah was pregnant. By Chris. But she didn't want to hurt you, so she had it removed, also because it wasn't her time yet to have a baby, she knew that. But Bella caught up on her, and asked a lot of money, more than Sarah had. So Bellatrix decided to play a game with her, one she'd definitely used. And when the game finished, Sarah was dead, and Bellatrix kept telling Severus that there was now 'one mudblood less'." Janet gulped and stared at Remus, who's face had gone pale. She bit her lip nervously, and seemed to consider whether it had been right to tell him.

"That-That's horrible." Remus sighed, thinking about Sarah. They stared at the sky, the twinkling stars that lit it up like a disco party. The moon seemed to smile at them, but he couldn't smile back.

"I know what Sarah have said know, if she had been alive." Janet said at once, and a small smile cracked open Remus' face.

"Oh really? What would she say?"

"That you're a stupid ass and have to start living. Not forgetting, but moving on. Live your life, jackass. That is what she would have said."

**

"Sirius?" He sat up in his bed, rubbing his eyes sleepily.

"Remus?"

"Yeah. Where's James?" Sirius scoffed softly as he stared over at James empty bed and tried not to think about what he'd do in wherever he was.

"What do you think?" Remus grinned and hopped down on his bed. Sirius stared in the soft eyes of the boy and found something changed. Renewed.

"Look, Padfoot. I'm sorry. For today, for everything. For this all." His arms wrapped around Sirius' waist. Sirius locked his arms around Remus' neck, nuzzling his head against his friend's chest. He smelled the wolfish Remus scent and smiled.

"I love you," Remus whispered in Sirius' hair. He looked up in surprise and smiled at Remus.

"Love you too, Moony."

Their mouths collided in a deep kiss, and Sirius fell on his beck in the bed. Remus sat up, sending him a lopsided grin, before drawing the curtains and hovering over him.

Sarah glanced at the two boys and smiled. "He has finally forgotten about you." A voice sang in her head. But she shook her head.

"Not forgotten about me. Made me a memory." She replied, grinning as Remus drew the curtains around the bed. "My job here is done."

"Does that mean you're coming back, then?" Her hand brushed though her hair as she thought about it.

"Yes, I think I will." With that she floated towards Remus, planted a kiss on his cheek and whispered: "I love you," in his ear.

Remus hear Sarah's voice and felt her on his cheek. He sat up confusedly and glanced around him. Sirius also sat up and stared at him. "Are you alright, Moony?" He asked concerned, more afraid he'd change his mind again. But Remus shook his head, and pushed Sirius back on the bed again.

"Yeah, I guess I just imagined something."

Sarah smiled and sent Remus a blow kiss, before turning around and flying out of the window. She climbed higher and higher in the purple midnight sky, until she gradually faded in the halo of the moon.


End file.
